Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why couldn't the farmer drive his tractor He had no arms why didn't he have arms Because he was a potato

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The motto of those who live in the Bible Belt; "The Bible Belt: Where being obese is 'Genetic' but being homosexual is a 'lifestyle choice'."

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A jewish man walks into a bar, has a drink, and goes home to his wife.

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why was 6 afraid of 9? because 7 ate 9 and 6 is afraid of ghosts

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Why was the boy crying? Because him and his sister were sent to an orphanage.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

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Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

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Knock knock Who's there? A fireman. You're house burned down.

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A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

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What did Christopher Columbus say to his men before they got on the ship? Get on the ship.

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Knock Knock Who is there? Orange Orange who? Orange-Banana

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why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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How do you take money from a Mexican? You don't because they have none.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut you racist bastard

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

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Why was the baby so hot? Napalm. Why was the baby so cold? Meat locker.

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Q.If I have four apples and billy has 4 oranges, how many pancakes will fit on the roof. A. 3 because aliens like purple hats.

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Why did the rose look so brown? Because it was dead

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Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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