What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Do you know what a zombie smells like? Death

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whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm Animals

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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What did the nazi say to the jew? Nothing, he shot 'em

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The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

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What happened to the lady? She queefed.

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What do you call a purple apple? Bruised.

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You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you come out of the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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Whats really ugly and horny Jake's mom

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why did the bus roll down the hill? Children were playing in the street.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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Why did Billy fall off his bike? He tried to kill himself.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops