Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you confuse a blonde? Try and teach her the finer points of Quantum Physics without allowing her to take any notes, and then test her on it.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whose your daddy? Not me

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q. What is the best way to suicide? A. Kill yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make a Cowboy cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse than getting no presents for Christmas? Ass-rape!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's worse then a bad hair day? Hattie.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

thumb_up thumb_down -13

gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops