Chuck Norris doesnt eat honey, hes allergic to it.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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What is the biggest lie ever? "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Use"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Guy 1: What the shit is that car? Guy 2: Its not a car. It's an alfa romeo

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

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Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

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red is red blue is blue derpy derp de derp

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What is the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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A white man, a black man, and a Mexican board a plane. The white man watches the on-flight film. The black man watches the on-flight film. The Mexican also watches the on-flight film. At the end of a long flight, they leave the plane and go do whatever it is they planned to do at their destination.

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so a moose walks into a super market and asked the lady where can I find the potatoes the lady says isle five so the moose goes to isle five and there aint no potatoes.

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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Q: Whats Brown and sticky A: an eagle except for the brown and sticky part

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Why did the midget fall from a tall building? Because somebody pushed him.

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A frog, duck, monkey and beaver each enter a bar being carried by a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. If your wondering, the redhead carried two animals.

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What happens when a unicorn gets her period? You know it's a girl.

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Whats the difference between 2 white men? They both have different jobs and one is racist orange peel.

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Why'd the girl fall off her bike? She rode over a curb

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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