What's the best way to make people notice you? Begin a cult that follows some crazy religious division and go on mass murdering sprees, looting, murdering, and raping everything that moves. Your prime targets should be schools, orphanages, and hospitals (maternity wards for bonus points). Eventually, walk up to the FBI unarmed and have them capture you. Then demand that you get interviewed, as you have instructed your followers that if you don't get to speak on public television, they will bomb multiple major cities. When they put you on TV, simply stare at the camera and say: "Senpai. The time has finally come for you to notice me." Then, because you are a cruel, heartless bastard with no morals whatsoever, have your men bomb the major cities anyway. Have fun!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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A guy finds a genie bottle. He rubs it. A genie appears and grant him 3 wishes. He wishes for a splendid woman, a lot of money, and a house.

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What do you call an asian with a small penis? Whatever his name happens to be.

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roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet, and so are you.

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what did the boy with cancer get for Christmas a pair of shoes

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Whats Worse then finding a worm in your apple. Finding a real joke on anti-joke.com

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Why did the chicken cross the road? he has an iq of 5 like all chickens

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What do you call a Mexican in the sand? A churro! (not trying to be racist, I'm even Mexican)

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if i get 1,000 likes ill kill your hole family

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Your family tree is like a cactus, its full of pricks. ;P

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A duck walks into a bar, the bartender says, "What'll it be?" The duck says "Got any grapes?"

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didnt.

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What did the carrot say to the apple? Sandals

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Why did the girl fall of her bike? Because she got hit by a fridge!

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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