why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

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Kid: My dad's brother has gone at it with a lot of women. Friend(sarcastically): Geez that's great! When was he born? Kid: '69

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What happened when the engineering student studied for a physics final? They failed.

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All of these jokes are about white people

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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How many zombies can you kill at once? about one or two unless your Chuck Norris with unlimited powers.

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What did the man with no head say to the women?

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the floor. How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail the other one to the floor.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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I would piss if alex berry had aids n died

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How many babies can you fit in an oven? Depends how hungry you are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops