So a blonde a, a red head, and a brunette crash land on an island, they all died within a week...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happends when two gay guys want to have kids? They can't, so they go to an orphanage and adopt one.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Guess where my mom lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my dad lives? Utah? Correct Guess where my aunt lives Utah!?!?!? NO!!!! Trick Question b... she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man walks into the bathroom. He dumps cat shit all over the floor

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A burglar broke into a house one night. He picked up a CD player to place in his sack and a strange, disembodied voice echoed from the dark, saying, "Jesus is watching you." He nearly jumped out of his skin, clicked his flashlight off, and froze. When he heard nothing more, he shook his head, clicked the light on, and began searching for more valuables. Just as he pulled the stereo out so he could disconnect the wires, he heard, "Jesus is watching you." Freaked out, he shined his light around frantically, looking for the source of the voice. Finally, in the corner of the room, his flashlight beam came to rest on a parrot. "Did you say that?" he hissed at the parrot "Yep," the parrot confessed, then squawked, "I'm just trying to warn you." The burglar relaxed. "Warn me, huh? Who in the world are you?" "Moses," replied the bird. "Moses?" the burglar laughed. "What kind of people would name a bird Moses?" "Devout Semites," the parrot replied.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock knock. Who's there? There's no need to ask this question due to the fact that most homes are built with peepholes nowadays.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are black your mamas white i didnt mean to say it but it's right

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What starts with ''F" ends in "uck" and usually means excitement? A Firetruck

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call it one an Arab and a Jew get married? Love.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the vegetarian eat a steak? Because he was not a vegetarian

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't the black man play hockey in college? He died of cancer while still in high school.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the dog say to the owner when he took him to the vet? A: Nothing. It's a dog. It can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops