Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, Show me your tits.

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Friends are like potato, when you eat them die.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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I'm so hungry I could eat a horse and chase the jockey.

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Roses are reb, Violets are dlue, Forgive my spelling, I'm byslexic.

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A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

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Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

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What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb? None. Mice don't have the strength required to do that.

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

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Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

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Two fish are in a tank. One is driving, the other is operating the gun. Two soldiers are in a tank. They both drown.

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What's the oppicite of brown???? Something not brown.

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One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

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Your Mom is so fat.... When she's goes to McDonald's and orders 3 Big Macs the people standing in line behind her all look at her with disgust and a tinge of pity.

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What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

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What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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What is life? Paul.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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