Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

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My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

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How did the blond become a pilot? By attending flight school, graduating, applying to an airline to which she subsequently was hired to, taking frequent training courses, and beginning work.

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What did the black man say to the jew at a party Well hello i don't believe we met.

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Why did the man get a DUI? Because he was driving under the influence.

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My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

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What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Your neighbor. Ok, Come in.

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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Want to hear a joke? Obama

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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Q: How do mentally retarted people read books A: They dont

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

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Snake: YES muahaha Eve eat the fruit from the three of wisdom muahahaha! Why do you not share with Adam? Muahahaha! Snake: Why is nothing happening? Then the sky opened and a heavenly voice spoke: "Well as long as none eats fruit from the three of KNOWLEDGE... Hmm, I better get rid of it altogether..." Snake: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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"knock knock" "who's there" *no answer* Opens door to find dead wife lying on doorstep with 'lol' stamped on forehead

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing

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Why is there air? To blow up basketballs

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Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot.. You racist bastard.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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