Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Q. What do you call an average middle-aged white man who walks into a bar and asks for a drink? A. Not a very funny joke

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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"To tea to to to" -- russian tourist, asking for two tea to room 22. (DOKA)

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your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

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How long did it take the man to swim the Atlantic? I don't know. Everybody stopped counting after a while and went on with their lives. His body was never found.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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Bill gates walked into a store and farted. It stunk up the entire place and the employees were mad. But it was their fault for not having windows.

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What did Hitler say to the Jewish boy? Nothing, Hitler died many years ago...

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Q: Why does the chicken cross the road? A: To get hit by a redneck.

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

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Three people are stranded on an island. They didn't want to eat each other because they were friends. They died of starvation.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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If life gives you lemons, You have a problem and you might need medicine.

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A storm be brewin!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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