- Anti Joke

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

No it doesnt..

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. leaves

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

A Bull walks into a bar. it killed three people by the fact it was a Bull

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

No it doesnt..

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. leaves

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

Q. I look in a mirror. What do I see? A.My reflection

roses are red voilets are red bushes are red trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE!!!!!!

Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

A Bull walks into a bar. it killed three people by the fact it was a Bull

What's long, hard, and in my pants? The SAT's... I lied about it being in my pants.

Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

A husband and wife just had a baby, and he came out black.

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

What can't catch or throw? A Quadriplegic

Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

How many seals does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Depends on how high the ceiling is.

No it doesnt..

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

Three men walked into a bar. The last one ducked.

What's worse than having two girlfriends at once. Seven. Seven girlfriends. All across America.

Q. what is black ans white and red all over A. a shot to death zebra

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. *leaves*

What’s big, grey, has wrinkly skin, and a trunk? An elephant. Oh, you’ve heard this one.

Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q: Hey, wanna hear a joke? A: Sure! Q: Alright, cool. leaves