Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

KEVIN CRUMMY SMELLS LIKE SARAHS (I)

your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My face isn't long relative to the others of my species, it is actually quite normal."

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

Why was darren too late for school today...? She got hit by the bus

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Whats black and hanging from a tree in my backyard? A tire swing

Which way do 5 gay guys walk? Depends on where they're planning to go.

I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service

What do you call a black man that works in a church A priest

What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

"Roses are red, violets are blue," she explained to the color blind child, who was unable to understand the concept of color.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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