Woman: do u want to watch Snakes on a Plane? Man: sure, what is it about? Woman: It's about a horse on a boat

What did the horse say to it's owner? It didn't horses can't talk

Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

In Soviet Russia, blonde is smart

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

what is red white and blue? the french flag

Yo mama so fat, when the waiter handed her the menu, she said "yes"

Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

What did the man do when he got home from work? Hit his wife.

Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

Your mom is so fat she probably has a body mass index of between 25 and 30 which is considered to be "overweight" but paradoxically is associated with fewer health risks by medical professionals.

I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

Q: why did the chicken cross the road A: you are adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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