- Anti Joke

What was the only reason a ginger ever won in a fight? It was against a Dementor.

Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

What is the biggest lie that's still close to the truth? You came out of your momma's asshole.

knock knock whos there santa santa who .....long pause he doesnt exist now go shoot urself

Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

What do you call a car with no wheels? Trash

Why did the Europeans colonise Africa Because they couldn't do it themselves

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

ever tried african food? they neither

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your one and only! Step away from the door, Francheska. You're violating the restraining order.

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

How do you learn how to drive? You get in the driver seat

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

-Your mom worked as a prostitute and died a virgin.

What really killed the dinosaurs? ME!!!

What's awesome and rides a unicycle? Rollercoasters. I lied about the unicycle.

Ask me if I'm God.. Dude, we all know you're not God.

Whats the difference between a monkey and another monkey? I dont know google it!

Why did the blonde lose her job as a teacher? Because she was in a sudden and violent car crash in which she died a slow agonizing death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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