What do you call a man who's arms have been amputated? It doesn't matter, he won't be able to pick up the phone.

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

Damn Nero... So you are saying there is no hope left, the underground society is dead and buried.

A little girl meets a homeless guy named Ian McDermott in downtown Atlanta She then screams stranger danger and a nearby policeman comes and arrests the man.

If I was in a room with hitler Osama bin laden and Justin bieber and a gun with 2 bullets. I would shoot Justin bieber twice

A white man, a black man, and a Mexican board a plane. The white man watches the on-flight film. The black man watches the on-flight film. The Mexican also watches the on-flight film. At the end of a long flight, they leave the plane and go do whatever it is they planned to do at their destination.

My girlfriend is getting an abortion tonight. Its a surprise.

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Seriosly. too much sex again?

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

Q. What happened first The Tree or The Apple. A. Johny Appleseed.

It's 4/20. You know what that means? Today is a Wednesday

What's worse than the common cold? The Plague.

I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

Oh please! Come on! Those that got to us where mostly Russians remember? And what where my parents? (if you do not know you might have guessed it by now) I found a guy that looked about the same as me, messed him up and put my jacket on him, I do not die that easily. Anyway, id explain more, but I have been without these fucking painkillers so long that I am talking trash on this stupid site again... Seriously the pain I am used to, but this addiction on painkillers is a bitch... (shedog if censor got a hold on it) But it turns out I cant sleep without them, sleep just does not come anymore, so Ill go get some now. Who are you by the way? I am Nero7, Aka Axel Knight.

What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

Why couldn't the horse open the door? - Because it was locked...Beeeeeeeeeeeeeef Jelly

A: Do you want to hear a joke? B: A ladie not working in the kitchen A: WTF dude thats just terrible

What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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