Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

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Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

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What did the man do when he crossed the road? Nothing he got hit by a car

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Why was the man upset? Both sides of his pillow were warm.

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Why did the Mexican fall off of a cliff? He lost is ballence.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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What did Jimmy do on his 8th birthday? Turn 8.

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sally has no arms knock knock who's there not sally

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Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Q: what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill? A: mudslide

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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Why did Rachel fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Rachel.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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Knock knock. Who's there? It's me. Oh, come on in. Thanks.

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What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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what do you call a bunch of black people in a pool cocoa puffs

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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If life gives you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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