What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

whats the difference between a black rapist and a white rapist? the black rapist is black

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

DEATH.

What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

Roses are red violets are blue I have five fingers the middle one is for you.

Roses are red,Here's something new ,violets are violets,not ******* blue

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

why did the girl moan in pain? she got punched in the face.

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

ALCATRAZ IS REOPENED!

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Whats black and runs really fast? Usain Bolt

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

Jerry Sandusky and two other men are on a cruise ship, when it suddenly starts to sink. The first man says, "save the children!" The second man says, "screw the children!" Jerry Sandusky drowned.

okay, there was a donkey and a parrot walking at the park. When it was raining the donkey says to parrot hey why is it so hot. Then a person riding bikes come to the parrot and she told her to sit down. Nobody saying hello but she can dance reallly nicely.

I remember my first beer. It did not taste good to me at the time.

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

if you can read this you dont' need glasses

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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