Why did i get some thing to eat? Because i was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

An alcoholic is someone you don't like who drinks as much as you do.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

You're such a baby, that you are still in diapers! Ew! How would you know creep!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

who is gay wit mon james cornish

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's worse than a work in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Seeing the same joke repeated thousands of times on anti-joke.com.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

I'm black and I will beat your children At checkers, they can have red

thumb_up thumb_down +25

An Iranian, a Mexican, and an American are on an airplane. The plane is too heavy to take off, so to lighten the load, each person has to throw off something their country has a lot of. The Iranian throws off a nuclear bomb. The Mexican throws off a sombrero. The American throws off an apple pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What did the dead man say to God? I'm dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

why did the man pee in public? ... he couldnt hold it in.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did I lose a card game to a cat? Cause he was a cheetah!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows because a chicken is incapable of communicating it's reason to humans.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops