What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

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gay pom...

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Whats the worst part about being fat. Your fat.

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what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

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What sound does a dog make? WOOF What sound does a cat make? MEOW What sound does a giraffe make? ...

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what do you get when a white woman and black man have a child? either a girl or a boy

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Roses are red Violets are blue Carnations are cheap and they will not get you a blow job.

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Knock knock who's there? Gary Glitter ?_?

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why did they plain crash? cause of gravity stupid

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Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

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Roses are wilting violets are wilting YOU HAD ONE JOB

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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i black man walks in to a bar.he askes if he can make out with you? the man says"no. black man says"why? the guy says"because im not homersexal. black man says"oh. boss says"hey i told you dont talk to black people. guy says"no i can ekplan.boss says no more of buts or buy. boss says" you are fired guy says"NO! boss says"yup both of you get out! guys say no two guards come to talk them out. THE END`DONE!

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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