The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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A priest, a nun and an Irishman walk into a bar. The barman says 'what is this, a joke?'

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A man entered ten puns into a pun contest, hoping that one of them would win. Unfortunately, he came in third place and was discouraged by his loss.

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What do you call a computer running Windows DOS? Obselete

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a bowling ball? You can't pick up a bowling ball with a pitchfork.

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Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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Do you know what Ethiopian food tastes like? Ethiopian food.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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Knock Knock! Who's there? I have a gun. Get in the car.

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Yo momma so fat she saw a yellow bus full of white kids and said, "STOP THAT TWINKIE!!"

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Q: How do you make Helen Keller cry? A: Casually remind her that she is both blind and deaf.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

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A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

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what do you call a kid with no legs and no arms some one who will nevaer forfill there bucket list cause they cant write it

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ha ha, I can talk and you can't.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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