How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Someone chucked a fridge at her.

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what do the parents of a starved family do? kill their kids chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

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why did Michael Jackson cross the road? He didnt he is dead.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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justin beiber sucks

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Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses walk into a bar and sit down at a table. They glare at each other for a moment before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

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What's the difference between your garage and mine? A pile of dead babies.

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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What's cold, tired, wet, and starving? A girl up at 4:00 am that just came out of a cold shower.

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A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

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Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

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Why did the bartender refuse to let the black man in ? Because the bar was about to close.

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How did Darth Vader know what Luke Skywalker got for Christmas? He's his dad. He bought the presents.

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why does the pie have apples in it? it was apple pie.

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A mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom says, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender replies, "Exactly. That's a health hazard. The health department already gave two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Roses are red, violets are blue shut the hell up, and sit the hell down

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What did the senator do after he typed he email? He clicked the send button.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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