So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

You know whats funny? Women's rights

Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

Want to hear a dirty joke? Jimmy fell in mud. Want to hear a clean joke? Jimmy took a bath with Bubbles. Want to hear a dirty joke? Bubbles was a clown.

A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

How do you tick off a Doctor? You cut off his right thumb.

Roses are bitches Violets are two, your mother is a bigger bitch then both

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

my wife out of the kitchen

Apple hates Blackberry.

If an oak tree falls in the woods, and the tree has 3 squirrel nest in them, then does a whale jizz in the ocean?

Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

What's the difference between Amy Winehouse and Michael Jackson? Spelling.

My neighbor's kid was running around yelling magical spells. I said "Wow, you really want to be like Harry Potter, don't you?". He said "Yes!". So, I killed his parents and locked him under the stairs.

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

"I'm so hungry!" "Hello so hungry, I am Matt. You must come from a very odd family if your name is " so hungry"!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You smell like lead, I did a poo.

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

what is sticky and brown a black guys stick

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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