knock knock whos there i have Alzheimer's I have Alzheimer's who Cream cheese

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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why did the person die? He was 90 years old and was sick. Its natural

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? Using teamwork and coordination, each can place one foot on the seat of the stool, and using each other for balance and support, they can all stand on the stool. The fact that they are gay is prevalent.

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Every 60 seconds In Africa......... A minute passes.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas many gift card to stores he liked

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A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

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a gay man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out for trying to seduce men.

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What comes after 69? 70

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

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Knock Knock. who's there? James. well use the doorbell.

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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So a penguin walks into a bar. Penguin's have been affected by global warming so much that they decide to drink away as they near their final hours.

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Drunk, a tweeker and a pot head are walking together when they come upon a huge wall with a large, locked gate in the middle of it. The drunk shouts "lesh shmash it down!" then passes out. The tweeker says "Dude, we should totally take the lock apart and see if there's some kind of mechanism in there holding it together that we can use to build some sort of machine for taking... oh man I gotta crap so bad! Either of you guys gota smoke?" and the pot head says "We should sit here and wait." I didn't say it was a good story

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Why did the portuguese fisherman take out a $20,000 loan with a reknown loan shark at exorbitant interest rates? He needed to buy a kidney on the black market for his drug addicted daughter who had also destroyed his credit score meaning he coudln't get a loan from the usual credit facilities such as banks and credit unions.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There Not Sally Why was the boy sad? Because he dropped his ice cream cone Why'd he drop his ice cream cone? Because he got ran over by a bus Why'd he get run over by a bus? BECAUSE SALLY WAS DRIVING

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What is a turkey? The offspring of a turtle and a monkey.

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How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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