What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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What do you call a black man with no legs? A fine example of the consequences of drink driving. Make sure you are physically stable or not under the effects of depressants, drugs or any form of alcohol before deciding to use a motor vehicle.

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Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

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Your mother is so fat, she struggles to control her weight even with dieting. Obesity and heart disease runs is in her mother's side of the family; she and everyone close to her is very concerned.

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Doctor doctor I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your worries you have aids!

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Why is the Asian 2nd grader sad? Her best friend was diagnosed with breast cancer. She has 3 weeks to live.

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write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

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What did batman say to robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why can't Micheal J. Fox draw a perfectly straight line? It is impossible for humans to draw perfect lines.

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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Why did the black man laugh at my joke? k.

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Como estan lo que sienta in el tarea de tomo caliente? A. Los sientos! ~ this is why nobody likes Spanish

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What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

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How did freedom die in Europe? It was shot in the chest with a rifle.

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The declaration of Independence was singed in? Pen.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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What is the difference between being a serial killer and a doctor? I'm not a doctor.

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Black people

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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