What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

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A smart kid just answered a question in class, a blonde girl then says "Nerd, your always answering all the questions". The teacher then says "Hey thats not nice, he could be your boss one day." The smart kid quickly replies "Highly unlikely, i do not plan on being a pimp when i grow up".

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What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

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What's funny about your mom? Nothing, she died three weeks ago.

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A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

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How many moose does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, it is biologically and theoretically impossible for a moose to climb a ladder and screw in a light bulb.

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A man walks in to a bar. Ouch.

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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Knock Knock Who's there? John John who? John Williams.

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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How do you fit a billion llamas into a box? you dont

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Y did the boy fall down the stairs???? He was In a wheel chair

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A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

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Why was the black man lynched? Because he was found by angry racists in the 1930's.

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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