- Anti Joke

What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

What's more fucked up that the Bill Cosby rape accusations? Sam and Adele's shower time on a Wednesday night

How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 116 years.

An Irishman walked into a pub.... He never left.

Why was the boy so tired? He had to carry his moms dead body up the stairs.

what's round, hairy, has eight legs- but isn't a spider? A spider.

If one train is heading North at 60 mph, na danother train is heading South at 45 mph, how many waffles are on the roof? The answer is purple, because aliens like coffee.

Why was the bus company sued? For substandard national safety regulations

Knock Knock. Who's there? Knock Knock. Knock Knock Who? Knock Knock (:

Why didnt the cannibal like the taste of the comedian? because the comedian smelled very bad and the cannibal forgot to add salt.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black I'm blind

Jimmy is at a movie ? He's with a gay boy

Did the single mother survive the plane crash? No.

99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

What's three times More dangerous than a war? Three wars

what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops