I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

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What happens when you cut down a tree? It falls down.

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Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

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A Mexican walks into Taco Bell, because it is the only restaurant within walking distance of his workplace.

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Q:what did the Aardvark say to the other Aardvark. A: nothing because Aardvark do not have the mental capacity to carry out basic conversations

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Why did the muslim cross the road? To blow up a train

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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There were two mufins in an oven. They did not say anything because muffins are incapable of speech.

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Whats black and white and red all over? My wife, i constantly beat her and I should probably be arrested for it if she didnt love me so much

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Wanna know way i don't eat grapes? I hate Grapes.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

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Your mothers so dumb that when she had to take a math test, she received a significantly lower grade than the rest of her classmates.

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Why did the man pee his pants? Because he was paralyzed from the waist down and had no way of feeling

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Q: Why are black people so tall? A: Not all black people are tall, and if they are it is probably from their specific genes.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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