What did the mental patient say to the apple? She didn't say anything because she was a catatonic schizophrenic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Irish man English man and a Scottish man all in a plane they jump out then they land

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why did the black man win the 100 meter dash? A: Because ever since he heard of this event, he has spent weeks preparing for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. What do you call Lebron James on a roller Coster? A. A man who makes a lot of money and decided to take his family out on a family fun day to an amusement park.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you get when you cross a dog with an anteater? An animal unlikely to survive beyond infancy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Care to fill in some of the etc etc`s for me? Its not like we are complete strangers one to another either, you and I I mean, I feel pretty secure around you.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? Kevin. Kevin who? Kevin Smith. Oh yes, Kevin Smith that lovely boy from just around the corner! Come on in!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Guy gets new car. TRANFORMER!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops