A: What did the Orange say to the Mango? B: Sup Hommie?! A: Wtf.... (awkwardly walks away)

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Half empty = half full Therefore Half (empty) = half (full) empty= full Half empty

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How do you get a girl with two jobs to drop on her knees? Through a penny on the knees

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How did the teenage mother get her baby to stop crying? Multiple stab wounds to its throat

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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yo mamma's so retarded that shes a potato

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Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

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What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

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telling real jokes on anti-joke is a form of anti jokes

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Why was the baby crying? He saw a nigga

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What do you call a bunch of Cubans on a boat in the Gulf of Mexico? A guy who just so happens to own a boat and is on a fishing trip with his buddies. -Mitch Hastings

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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Why did the Chicken Cross the Road? The Light was red.

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Whats long hard and full of semen? A dick.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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Inspirational speaker: "You can judge a man by the way he treats those who can do nothing for him." Me: "Hitler loved dogs."

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what has two lags and red all over? :a cat in a chinies restrunt...

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Why did the little boy rush downstairs to the living room on Christmas morning? because he heard his mother screaming rape.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "I'm going to kill everyone you've ever loved you fucking cocksucker, you think you can get away with sleeping with my wife? You better think again kiddo I will take away everything from you until you are reduced to a smoldering ruin of what you once was, mark my words bitch."

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Why is a T-shirt like a topaz statue of the Archangel Gabriel? They both start with 'T'.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops