Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Have 5 Fingers The Middle One's For You!! :D

thumb_up thumb_down -37

how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What`s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff What did the banana say to the ear? Hello

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -37

What do you call a white guy in a joke? The first joke to specify one of the people in the joke as one with Caucasian origin.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

How do you stop 5 black guys from raping one white girl? You call the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

What does a cow do at McDonald's? He is eaten by obese people.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

thumb_up thumb_down -39

So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Where's Stevin Hawkins? He went for a walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

thumb_up thumb_down -41

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

thumb_up thumb_down -41

Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -41

why was the boy crying? cause an elephant tusked him up the ass

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What starts with the letter P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

thumb_up thumb_down -43

Knock knock. Whos there? Death. You will die in the next 12 hours from terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -43

There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops