Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

roses are green violets are green i was drunk last night

well now

Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

What do you call a mexican man working at a Taco Bell? A young man freshly out of high-school, who could not get into college because his family is sadly struck with poverty. He also has a baby on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection when having relations with his girlfriend while he was intoxicated. I wish him the best of luck!

Penis

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

what did the mother say to the banana? I'm going to eat you like your father.

Yo mama is so fat that she is in a diet and wants to lose weight by eating healthy.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

Your mommas so dumb she had to climb a glass wall to see what was on the other side! But the glass was slippy so she never saw what was on the other side.

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

Why does Matt Daly do in his free time? it involves his finger and his own buttwhole

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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