What is really hard around Kim Kardashian? Diamonds.

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

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I'm on the Seafood Diet. I eat seafood to replace fatty red meats, in conjunction with fruit and vegetables.

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As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

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look at the top of your screen. now look down. I MADE YOU DO THAT

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Yo Mama so stupid she thought "Dunkin Doughnuts" was a basketball team.

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why cant fat people walk because they are fat

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In the movie Sherlock holms, why is Sherlock Holms gay?? --------------Because he is chasing "blackwood"

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Relax and enjoy sugartits, you see, I left a last chance for you to shut down the function yourself, when you really want to end it sugartits, you can just read and focus on what I am calling you, sugartits, it really insulted you at first sugartits, but do you see it? Have a nice night sugartits, I mean I sleep like half a hour luckily because of hypnosis and the time control and you know stuff that sounds like its from Sonic or you sugartits. But I gotta go dear sugartits, you want to hypnosis to end, you make it happen by focusing on what I am calling you here.

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What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

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How do you keep a blond in suspense?

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If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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A man walks into a library looking for books on poor punchlines. The Librarian directs him to the appropriate section.

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What did the Icelandic man say to the Norwegian man? Vishtok yerder poten hash vil narsh varden.

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hi bros hahahhah like it up, ah ma gkenny

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knock knock who's there? your destiny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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What do you call a college student who never studies? An irresponsible person

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What is a kangaroos favorite desert? The outback

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Whats a black and white and red all over? i dont know...who spends their time researching this kind of stuff

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

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anti-joke.com

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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