What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

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Little Miss Muffet sat on her tuffet eating her curds and way, along came a spider who sat there beside her and asked, "Hey bitch what's in the bowl?"

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i was in bed with a girl recently and she said to me 'I want tonight to be magical', so afterwards i disappeared.

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Where would canada be without nature? still here

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Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

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roses are red violets are blue some poems are good and some don't

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What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

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i remember when i was a child i wanted a skateboard but my parents would never buy me one so late one night i crept downstairs and got a hammer and some wood and i beat them to death my foster parents baught me 5 skateboards

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What did the chicken say to the black guy? Nothing, humans and chickens can not communicate.

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Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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Yo mama is so short, she has trouble reaching the top shelf.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding worms in your stool.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Who's the best German Chef? Hitler

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse answers, "Because I'm an alcoholic."

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Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

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What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops