A White and a Chinese got in a fight, who won? None. The fight was unable to begin because a color is not a living organism.

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

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Why was billy bad at telling jokes? Billy was sexually abused as a child and humour was never really part of his life

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Why did the chicken kill himself To get to the other side.

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Your mam is so fat.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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Q: Why was jimmy's mom crying? A: Because her doctor said their were going to get rid of he cancer, 5 minutes later hey came back in and told her that he had made a mistake and that was for someone else, she was actually only had a month to live.

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How do you make time fly? You can't, time is the duration of events and therefore cannot "fly".

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Why did the chicken cross the traffic filled road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? Chicken delivery.

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Knock Knock. Who´s there? Tsu Tsu who? TSUNAMI!!!!!!!

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A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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What did the vibrator say to the condom? Watch, I'll get laid before you do!!!

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely for no discernible reason as chickens are animals with poor reasoning skills.

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Roeses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Name Is Dave, Microwave

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There was a fat man crying. I just told him the local Mc D's was arson attacked.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? -She had no arms *Knock Knock* Who's there? -Not Sara!

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Q: What do you call a dear with no eyes A: Nothing - call an animal cruelty service

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What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops