Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why didn't jimmy get to eat his ice cream? Because he got hit by a bus

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the patient die of aids disorder? Butt sex. Lots and lots of butt sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a moose walks into a grocery store and asks the clerk, who is a penguin, "Where's the bread?" And the penguin says "On isle three!" But, when the moose gets to isle three... The bread isn't there!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Sam have no friends? He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the carpenter cry? Somebody killed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not your cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you keep a blond in suspense?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How much weight can an ant carry up a mole hill? Ice cream has no bones.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What has a beard and bombed the World Trade Center? Osama Bin Ladin. No, but seriously he's a terrorist.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q:what does jgjdhter hjldhgukrh mean A: it means something it is a real word

thumb_up thumb_down -2

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a three-legged cheetah? Crippled.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops