What she says: “You’re really sweet, but I have a boyfriend.” What she means: “You’re really sweet, but I definitely don’t want to date you.”

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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What did the cat say to the human? Nothing

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Why do elephants paint there feet yellow? so they can hide in mustard bottles. Have you ever seen an elephant in a mustard bottle? exactly

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Why was the man sad? Because he found his 80 year old mother had been raped and murdered in her home...

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Soccer...

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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whats the easiest way to kill a baby? let it live a long and meaningful life, prolonging the inevitable death of old age.

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What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tennis? Tennis who? Tennis Racket

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Q: What do you call a cow wearing a hat? A: A cow wearing a hat.

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Why did Sally failed gym class Because she couldn't do push ups

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Why did the woman spend all her time in the kitchen? For fear of her abusive husband.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? Well, the difference is quite obvious. one's a car, the other's a dead baby.

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A man walked into a bar. That hurt.

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How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

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Why was the black child found dead in water? He was raped and thrown into a river.

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how many terminaly ill 5 year old cancer patients does it take to burn to supply enough energy to make toast just 4.5 :)

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. You are a prostitute. I have a dollar.

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What did the ant do? I don't care you whore

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

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A man with two broken legs walks into a bar.

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what did the purple horse say to the goat? horses don't talk....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops