What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

Where did Suzy go during the bombing? Everywhere

Why did the director call cut? Because he was shot dead by Nazis.

.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

Whats funnier than a dead baby?... a dead baby dressed as a clown whats funnier than that?... A pile of dead babies dreesed as clowns Whats funnier than that?... that the baby in the bottom of the pile is alive.

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

Do't you just hate when a sentence doesn't end how you think it will and it just octopus.

Why did the little girl die so suddenly? The bullet got her right in the heart.

why did the mexican beat your ass larry clark III because you live in a apartment with your mom and dad who are black your dad has a truck your mom recked her car

The woman says : OMG I am so hung over!! The man next to her has Terrible tourertts turns around and shouts I want my to make them hung over your face, her then moves away and rapes a apple of which he is eating, the woman turns around and dies as she has a brain tumor

Why didn't little Timmy get anything for Christmas? He was an orphan living on the streets.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

What did the cow do when it got run over by a tractor? It died.

What do Batman and Harry Potter have in common? Their parents are dead.

what did the boy with no arms and legs get for chrismas ? cancer

A woman went outside for some fresh air.

Whats more annoying than listening to another arrow in the knee joke? bink2w32.dll is missing from your computer.

What's short, green, and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

why was the apple on the ground? because it fell

What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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