What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam...

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How do you hook up with a really hot chick? This website is intended for Anti-Jokes, Not Dating Advice.

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What did romeo say to Juliet? A lot of things, Then he gave her a flower.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. my Mom is a hooker.

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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yo mama so fat she decided to go on a diet :)

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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What is the best way to kill Kony? Shoot him in the head.

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Whats Brown And Sticky?! My Shit!

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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Chris: Hey, want to hear a sad joke? Joe: No, those are mean and offensive.

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What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

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Did you hear the one about the spoon and the dis running away while the cow jumped over the moon, IMPOSSIBLE! eating material such as the spoon and dish are inanimate objects, and cows cant jump for they weigh from 600 to 1000 lbs.

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Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

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Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his head

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What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

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Why doesn't the fat kid have any friends? Because he is fat.

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What do you call a chair in the middle of the road? A danger to drivers.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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how do you crash a party? You dont because that would be rude.

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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Why does Michael Jackson like twenty eight year olds? Michael Jackson is dead.

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Did you here that Hellen Keller got hit by a bus? No. Neither did she.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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