Ask me if I'm a tree? Are you a tree? No.

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Q. Why was the black man sad? A. He had a book nailed into is leg.

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I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

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Why did John McCain lose the election? He did not get as many votes as Barack Obama.

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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I used to be an Adventurer like you, but then i took and arrow to the Elbow.

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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"knock knock" "whos there" "poop" "poop who" "poop in the toilet"

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What do you call a boy with no arms or legs and an eyepatch? names...

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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What time is it when it is time to get a watch? About 4:30, unless its a monday.

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Q: How do you cure cancer? A: By die aids first

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Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

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A woman walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Yes ma'am?". She orders a gin and tonic, but the bartender had gave her two without realising, and so she pays for one only. She starts to contemplate whether to tell the bartender about his error or to just leave it and have a free glass of gin and tonic. However as she is a christian, gluttony is a sin, and she already had enough to drink today. However, she feels the need to have a relaxing drink today, because as she was on her job as a receptionist, when a customer tripped on the last step of the stairs behind her and broke his neck, dying instantly, which deeply saddened her. This later led her to indulge on 3 glasses of red wine in the staff room. She finally concludes after a few moments pondering, to not tell the bartender about his error, and pampered herself with two relaxing glasses of gin and tonic. Her dead, mutilated body was later found in the rubble of a car after a head-on collision with a truck.

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A black man is driving a nice car when he's suddenly pulled over by the police. "Do you know why I pulled you over?" asks the cop. "No officer" replies the black man. "You have a taillight out. However I'm going to just let you off with a warning because you seem like an upstanding citizen. Have a nice day."

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How old are you? 7

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what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

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Why wasn't the crow allowed on the plane? He had too much carrion luggage

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What did the docter say to its patient? What?? Im sorry sir you have aids

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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