why did the duck fall in the water? It got shot

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Sometimes I stare at a Frisbee and wonder why it is getting bigger. Then, it hits me.

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Why was the young Jewish boy afraid at camp? Because his scoutmaster is a pedophile.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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A black man, a jewish man and a white man walk into a bar. The black man shoots the bartender, the white man takes the money and the jewish man holds the customers hostage.

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who's yellow , and looks like a bear? pudsey

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What is intangible and has every color on the rainbow? A rainbow.

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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Liar liar, your dead nans carcass is on fire.

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What's black and white and red all over? A modern abstract painting

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What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

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Poop

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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What'd the left nut say to the right nut? How's it hangin?

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What did the stick of butter say to the lemon? "I'm a stick of butter"

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Do you like fishsticks No

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A black guy and a white guy both get pulled over by a cop for speeding. The white guy is promptly released with a stern warning, whle the black guy is thouroughly questioned and has his car searched for drugs, with the probable cause being that the black guy has bloodshot eyes, reeks of weed and has a bong in his frontseat.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to buy plus size clothes because small size clothes would be inappropriate for her to wear.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Whats slippery and wet? A wet slipper.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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