Why did the chicken cross the road. It's head was cut off and it didn't know where it was

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why am I who i am, and you are who you are? dick spice

thumb_up thumb_down -32

yo mama has one big titty and one small titty and the call the bitch paul

thumb_up thumb_down -32

baloney sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the woman cross the road? Why the hell is she out of the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats worse than it raining on your birthday? 911

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats black and white and musty? A nuns pussy because it never gets used.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

diarrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did the koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was dead Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? -Because it was stapled to the first koala

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why are people attacking the Jews we gave you so much things like: Television (Thomas Edison) Electricity (Thomas Edison) Weapons (Arvin Humbergs) Wifi (Edcolsin Vinstein) Be gr8 ful without us your nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Jesse is so fat, his weight on his scale says " hahaha gotta love childhood obesity"

thumb_up thumb_down -32

i just got pulled over by a cop. he asked me if i had been drinking, i said no. he asked me to step out of my car so he could look inside i looked nervous, and had no other choice to step out. he knew there was something in there he looked in and saw it THE REFRIDGERATOR

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Here's a riddle... A cowboy rides into town on saturday, stays for three days, and leaves on saturday... How does he do it? Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... Well, you see he is a time bending magician who usually lives on a farm on Mars with his family of magicians. He is not really a cowboy but dresses like one to be like everyone else. He is heavily affected by peer pressure and has done a lot of dumb things just to impress his partners. His partners are big bullies and they have trouble being nice to Jimmy (The time-bending, space-living, cowboy-impersonating martian). His partners names are Bob and George. Oh right... I'm trailing off... OH... I'M DONE NOW...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

My dog has no nose, how does it smell? Using its anus.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The first is a person of the Jewish Faith and the other is a popular item of food.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A husband said to his wife, "If you want to have sex, stroke my penis one time. If you don't want to have sex, just say so and I will respect your decision, though I may be disappointed."

thumb_up thumb_down -34

My friend told me to jump right off a cliff That's impossible since this cliff goes left...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops