Why didn't the Baby wake up? Because it was dead

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I have a red ferrari and 20 dead babies in my garage. Didn't I have a blue ferrari?

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

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How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in a circle and tell her to sit in the corner.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets wasted and forgets the punchline.

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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Gay's

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Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

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what did the blind, deaf, retarded child, without any arms or legs get for Christmas? nothing, his parents are dead

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Why is that man such a perv? I don't know. Ever since I let him see my boobs, he has had this undying obsession with sex. So, I guess that, as society would classify him, he is a sex addict. He will do anything for it, even if he needs a man to get it. I feel terrible about starting his obsession, and plan to take him to therapy next week for the sake of his health.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

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chuck norris

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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Knock Knock Whos there? It was the unexpected arrival of his wifes lover who'd been having an affair with her for over a year She thought her husband would be out and forgot to tell him not to come The husband started breaking down in tears whilst throwing insults at both of them, grabbing the man by his collar and throwing him on the ground he started to kick his head in The man died and the husband and wife divorced, theres now a bench in the mans local park dedicated to him.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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What do chinese people eat? Chinese food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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