A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

Two muffins were in the oven...They were taken out after about 40 minutes, and then enjoyed by all.

A German challenged an Englishman to a duel But their neigbours found out and alerted the police

A man works at a brick factory. He is told by his boss that if he is to steal any brick from the factory, he will be sacked. But every day the man steals one brick and puts it in his lunch box to take home and is not caught. One day he has enough bricks to build a house, and he says "When I build this house there will be none left over". The house is now built and while the man is taking a look around he stubs his toe on something, he looks down to see a brick and he sighs, picks up the brick and throws it in the air. There are two pilots driving a plane, one has a dog and one has a wardrobe. One pilot says to the other "I don't particularly like dogs" then the other pilot says to him "I don't really like wardrobes". They then make an agreement and throw both the wardrobe and the dog out the window. Five minutes later one pilot looks out the window out onto the plane wing, and guess what he sees? A brick.

Ginger woodpecker throbbing in the moonlight

How Do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open the door put the elephant in and close the door. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Open the door take the elephant out put the giraffe in and close the door. The lion king has a meeting with all the animals but one doesn't turn up, which one is it? The giraffe because it's still in the fridge.

Why was Cathy sad. Her husband Drew was killed by a land mine on a peace keeping mission to Iraq.

Two Guys Walk into a bar, you would think one of them would've seen it

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Kindly ask him to come down.

If you send someone fudge, you should write them a poem with it Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge!

roses are red but violets are definately violet what retard made this rhyme

I haven't had sex for about 2 years, 10 months, 20 days and 4 minutes. It doesn't bother me though.

Why was the Pædophile arrested? He hit his wife.

What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

What do you call a man who can't sing. Untalented and he should probably find a new profession

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

What is bloody and has two legs? Half of a cat.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Batman. Batman who? Batman is stunned by the fact that there is in fact someone that does not know him.

What's green and has wheels? A green car.

Once upon a time there was a pure and beautiful girl who lived with her step-mother and her two step-sisters. They made her live in the basement and had her do all the chores while they went to parties. Then social workers came and relocated her to a foster family.

What did Hitler say to his empire, A lot of stuff that I am to lazy to look up, all i know that the holocaust was bad and we shouldn't repeat it.

Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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