I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a question.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down +18

roses are red voilets are blue my dog stinks and so do you!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man is writing with a #2 pencil. He looks down and sees that it says "Made in China." He shrugs and continues writing

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

why didn't the chicken cross the road? there are no roads in factory farms.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

thumb_up thumb_down +16

TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Have you seen the size of their fingers!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Yo mamas so fat We are all concerned for her health

thumb_up thumb_down +16

whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops