If John has 50 candybars and eats 45 of them how many does he have left? Diabetes.

Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

What did the German say when the whole of India blew up: "Wow, das muss eine gewaltige Explosion haben! Wie haben sie das geschafft?"

Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

What happened to the boy who cried wolf? He was brutally raped and killed, Inglewood is really not a place you want your children growing up.

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

Your mom is so fat, she got obese and died.

A Blonde, a brunette, and a redhead where hiding from the police They were all shot and all died because they were playing Grand Theft Auto 5

What's fat and ginger? My dog.

How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? It depends how hard you throw them.

A black guy walks into a bar. He falls unconscious and an ambulance is quickly called to bring him to the hospital.

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

you

What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

how do u get a blonde to stay away from her credit card... i dont know im blonde

How do you trap a squirrel? You carefully set up a trap and place acorns in the trap.

What's black and white and read all over? A lot of things.

whats a willy? -brock

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...