Roar, roar! I am the king of the jungle! But did you know the lion would be defeated by a polar bear in a battle between the two?

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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So I took this girl into my room we got in bed, We got under the covers and.... We had a rather delightful game of scrabble.

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What happened to the man who sat outside in the sun too long? He died of skin cancer.

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rape that shit

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roses are red viloits are blue Bernard is hot but then i led to you

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what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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Breast cancer.

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Three logicians were travelling up to Scotland in a train. They saw a black cow standing parallel to the train tracks; the first sign of life since crossing the border. The first logician says "Oh, so they do have black cows in Scotland." The second logician says "No, they have at least one black cow in Scotland." The third logician says "No, they have at least one cow in Scotland, one side of which, at least, is black."

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A man walks into a bar. It was a metal bar. He cracked his skull and died in the hospital shorty afterward.

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"Knock, Knock," a man called out. A child threw open the door and peered out at him. "Why didn't you just knock instead of saying 'knock knock'?" Flustered, the man couldn't come up with an answer, and the child promptly closed the door, locked it, and returned to her previous activities.

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Two cows are in a field. One says to the other, "are you worried about this mad cow disease that's going around?" The other replies, "I'm not worried - I'm a squirrel."

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Bob

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what do you get when you cross do you get when you cross a banana and a monkey? one happy monkey

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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Whats funny about the Holocaust? Absolutely nothing considering millions of people perished and you people think its funny!

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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So there are three black people on a plane. The pilot comes over the intercom and says "Wow wow wow wait a second... ...why are there only three people on this plane? This is a commercial flight"

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What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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