How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

What did the orphan get on his birthday? Cancer.

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

what is the difference between a black person and a little boy with autism .... the boy with autism is smarter with more education than the black person

What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

Why did the teenager cross the road? To get an abortion.

whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

You smell like shit

A man walks into a bar and says "Ow".

nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

More mindfuck "government hypnosis edition": What can doctors possibly do in order for you to wait enough for them to come to help you? They call you "their PATIENT!" Moral: So be patient and wait, oh thee brainwashed.

What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken is subject to speculation.

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

What does a blond see when she looks at a dog? A four legged mammal, refered to as canis lupus familiaris, or what is commonly known as a dog.

There once was a man in Peru Who dreamed he was eating his shoe He awoke with a fright In the middle of the night To find that someone was breaking into his house

How do you know your sister is on her period? - Your dad´s dick tastes like blood.

A man walks into a bar . . . he is tired and thirsty after a long day at work.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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