roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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TEAM Together Everyone Argues More

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Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the blonde get fired from the m&m factory? She made skittles.

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An Irish priest molested many children. He's still free today

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Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

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What's black and white and red allover and can't fit through the door? A nun with a spear through her neck

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What did the widow get for her birthday? Nothing from her husband.

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A midget walks under a bar

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What did the dog say when the woman put a sweater on him? Nothing, dogs can't talk and he has no idea what is going on

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What is large white and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A refridgerator

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

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Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

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Which side of a chicken has more feathers? The outside.

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Knock knock. Is someone there?

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Knock Knock! Come in!

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Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

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What does a human have in common with a tree?? You can cut a humans leg of and count the....oh wait

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What is funny about a child with down syndrome? Nothing.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. What about the vampires?

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What'd the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. He's Jewish, remember?

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What has sand and an ocean? A picture of a beach.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops