a cat a dog and a penis meet up. The cat said ur lucky, when you have to pee u can go wherever you want. the dog said your lucky you can go in a litter box. the penis said your lucky u dont have to put a ballon over your head and do pushups till you throw up!!!

Knock knock Who's there? No Who is over there

Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

Why did the man try to lick his elbow? Because he read a chain email saying no one could lick their elbow and he wanted to see if it was true. You will probably try to do it now too.

I had my period 3 days ago.

Every sixty seconds in Africa... a minute passes - plz like to save Africa!

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

What did one hipster say to the other hipster? I'm not a hipster.

what is a jews favorite holiday? the halocaust.

Q - What do you call a hamburger without pickles? A - You call it a hamburger just without the pickles.

What happened to your face? I walked into a tree

Why didn't the monkey fall out of the tree when someone threw a refrigerator at it? Because it was already lying on the floor dying of AIDS.

How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

Why did a boy drop his ice cream? The Holocaust.

Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

How do you stop moles from digging in your garden? Take the shuvel away.

Lady Gaga didn't have anything to wear to the playboy party.

The BCS

How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? Four, one to take the light bulb out, one to put a new in, one to hold the ladder, and one to hold the guy holding the ladder

a kid calls 911 and says ,"is this 911?" and the operator says ,"NO! THIS IS PATRICK!!!!!!"

What's black and white and red all over? A mime lying in a pool of blood.

How did the blind man know when to open his parachute when he went skydiving? The leash went slack.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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