Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How do you make sushi if you are a fish? Commit suicide and sell yourelf to a sushi resturant!

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dead battery come on down

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milly, milly, milly, cat

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Q: A jew and asian and a normal white guy walk into a resturan, who orders the cheapest meal. A: the Asian, its 1940 and the jews dead

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So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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A boy asks his father how babies are made. The father responds, "Babies are created via coital sex. A man rhythmically inserts his erect penis into a woman's vagina until he ejaculates. If his semen successfully fertilizes her egg, a baby will slowly grow in her uterus. After roughly forty weeks of gestation, the baby will be born."

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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Two black men go inside a movie theater. They sit down and watch the movie.

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

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violets are blue, my name is Dave. this poem makes no sense. microwave.

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If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

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What is Worse than the holocaust?

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Why is pi? Because circles.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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Q: What did the blonde woman say? A: My hair is blonde

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your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

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Whats worse than finding a jew in you bed. Jake skellern

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A new restaurant KKKcake

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how do you make a plummer cry? you kill his family

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? My cheese

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why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

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Q: What did the guy with glasses say to the guy without glasses? A: Dude your not wearing glasses.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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