Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

whats 2+2? 4

A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

Roes are red Violets are blue I felt silly for writing this Because violets are violet.

Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

why do some Jewish people have big noses? There religion doesn't affect the size of there nose it really depends on genetics, like the if there parents had a big nose, or a small one would probably affect the size of a Jewish person nose

Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

What did the cowboy say to the skunk? You smell.

How do you get straight A's? Try really hard throughout the school year and when it comes to the exams study enough to ensure you understand all the material, but so so much as to compromise your sleeping pattern, and in turn, your performance on the day.

A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

One day, John ate some food. He quickly realized he had an upsetting feeling in his stomach, so he stopped eating food and used the restroom. Then he drew a picture.

Roses are white Violets are black I'm colorblind That is sad

What did the man do when he was tired Nothing he went to bed

Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

how do you kill a blonde? shoot her in the face with a pistol

The class valedictorian is about to give his speech to the class. He has 6 fingers total, he is missing an ear, his left nostril is burned shut, and he must walk on crutches because of the severe injury to his left knee. How does the extremely cruel Principal of the school introduce him? "Please welcome Gregory Barnes, a brave soul that conquered a battle against death itself an won".

Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

What do you get when you cross a donkey and a horse? a mule

What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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